Mental health
3 min read

Loneliness

Published on
August 2, 2024
Contributors
Dr. Mataroria Lyndon
Co-Founder & Director of Health Equity, Tend Health
Dr Alexandra Lafaele
General Practitioner, Tend Kingsland
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Loneliness

Loneliness is a distressing experience that occurs when a person feels a lack of meaningful social connections or a sense of isolation. We all have times when we feel lonely, but adults aged over 65 and young people aged 15–24 are most at risk.

Long term loneliness can have significant mental and physical health implications.

Symptoms 

  • Emotional symptoms:
    • Feelings of sadness, hopelessness, or helplessness.
    • Anxiety and stress.
    • A sense of emptiness or worthlessness.
  • Physical symptoms:
    • Trouble sleeping or insomnia.
    • Lack of energy or fatigue.
    • Physical pain or discomfort without a clear medical cause.
  • Cognitive symptoms:
    • Poor concentration and memory issues.
    • Decline in cognitive function.

As a young person who is lonely, you may show different signs. These can include: 

  • Missing school
  • Spending long times alone in your room
  • Feeling unusually bad tempered and irritable
  • Becoming hooked on social media, or avoiding social media altogether.

For some people, loneliness can be an early warning sign that your mental health may be deteriorating. Withdrawal that comes from feelings of loneliness may also have a negative impact on your health, or undermine your resilience to existing health conditions.

Risk factors

  • Living alone: Increased risk for those who live by themselves.
  • Loss of loved ones: Losing a spouse, friends, or family members.
  • Health issues: Chronic illnesses or disabilities.
  • Retirement: Loss of daily social interactions and a sense of purpose.
  • Mobility issues: Difficulties leaving the home or participating in activities.

If any issues arise that can contribute to loneliness, deal with them when they happen or get help if you need to. Take special care if you live or work alone, retire, develop an illness or disability, lose someone or something, move to a new area, job, school or university or notice signs you are developing social anxiety. It’s always easier to prevent loneliness in these situations than it is to overcome it.

Health effects

  • Mental health: Increased risk of depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders.
  • Physical health: Higher susceptibility to cardiovascular diseases, weakened immune system, and other health conditions.
  • Mortality: Studies have shown increased mortality rates among those experiencing severe loneliness.

What to do if you are lonely

Find the first small step to take in these areas:

  • Taking care of your physical health: Regular physical exercise can improve both mood and physical health. Consider group activities like walking clubs. Even if you don’t feel like it, taking care of your physical wellbeing gives you more energy to address your loneliness. Make it a priority to go for a walk or do some kind of exercise each day, get plenty of sleep and eat a balanced diet that gives you the nutrients you need. Pick one thing you would like to improve and set yourself a small goal to start.
  • Looking after your mental wellbeing: Take some time each day to meditate or go for a walk. Learning mindfulness techniques, practising gratitude and knowing how to manage stress or anxiety can all help with boosting your wellbeing.
  • Reaching out to others and stay connected: Spending time with other people can help stop you from feeling lonely and give you the chance to share experiences, thoughts and ideas. Participate in community groups, hobby clubs, or senior centres. Leverage video calls or social media to stay in touch with family and friends, or loved ones.
  • Education and learning: Engage in lifelong learning, classes, or online courses to stimulate your mind and meet like-minded people.
  • Getting help if you need it: talk to a mental health professional or counsellor for support.

What to do if you know someone who is lonely

  • Reach out
    • Visit or call regularly, even small gestures can make a significant difference.
    • Offer to help with errands or chores.
  • Encourage participation
    • Encourage them to join local clubs or activities that interest them.
    • Help them with transportation if mobility is an issue.
  • Be patient and listen
    • Sometimes just listening and being there is the most valuable support you can offer.
  • Promote use of technology
    • Teach them how to use smartphones, tablets, or computers to stay in touch with loved ones.
  • Connect with community resources
    • Provide information about local support groups, senior centres, and community programs.

Resources

  • Age Concern New Zealand: Offers a range of services and support groups for the elderly.some text
  • ElderNet: Provides information about residential care and community support services.some text
  • The SeniorLine: A free information service for older people about community groups and services.some text
    • Phone: 0800 725 463
  • Healthline: Call for free health advice from a registered nurse.some text
    • Phone: 0800 611 116
  • You can also free call or text 1737 any time to talk to a trained counsellor.

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